Monday, August 5, 2013

Various Stages of Menopause

...and on a ROAD TRIP!!
Sisters, aged 55, 57 & 59, set off for their weekend in Virginia Beach. The driver, 55, was already anxious waiting for 57 to find her way out of the Philadelphia 30th street train station where she was being picked up after a visit with her pregnant daughter in Connecticut. 59 wasn’t sure she wanted to go on this trip but she soon got into the spirit of things. The front wheels of the  two door Chevy coupe had barely touched Interstate 95 when 57 had to pee. This was after a good twenty minutes of complaining about the crisp morning air coming in 59’s window blowing in her face and making her chilly. Taking the next exit, the group stopped at a MacDonald’s where, after helping 57 from the cramped space in the back and hitting the bathroom, they waited for two youthful employees to stop playing before they could put their orders in. Guess what 57 bought? Yup, she got a cup of coffee to help her stay alert! 59 didn’t think that was wise.
On the road again, 59 doesn’t like the air conditioner that 55 has to have on because she doesn’t want to be stuffy and they can’t open the window because 57 doesn’t like the air in her face! None of this really matters because 57’s legs are cramped in the back seat and she needs to stop to get her jacket from the trunk so she can be warm. Traffic is slow from all the roadwork around the Baltimore/Washington area and soon darn near comes to a crawl. But it’s okay—57 has to pee again!
Soon back on the road and this time with 59 in the back so 57 is not complaining about the open window, her legs being cramped, and 55 won't need to turn on the air conditioner which was freezing 59. A whole hour passed before 57 had to pee again! Good timing too because 55’s legs were getting achy and she could stretch them while 57 used the bathroom. By this time 59's body had grown stiff and she needed to be pulled from the back seat!
Lots of good conversation, hours of laughing (and peeing), miles of fun later, the sisters arrived at their destination, entered their room where one undressed to be cooler, one put on her flannel pajama's to stay warm, and one...well, who knows--they promptly went to sleep!!
The End.
The names of the individuals in this tale have not been used so as not to insinuate anyone is menopausal!
Growl and roar-it’s okay to let the beast out.-J. Hali Steele

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