Thursday, July 3, 2014

Bad Boys - I Think its a Disease

BAD BOYS - I think it's a disease.

What causes the normal conservative woman to go crazy when they see a good-looking bad boy? Is it the shades, the tight pair of jeans, the long hair, the Harley parked out front, or is it a non-diagnosed disease, we as women, are born with, that makes us want to cast aside our inner inhabitations and run off into the sunset with one?

Hopefully you’ve had more common sense than I’ve previously known when it comes to these shaded hunks; because Honey, I’ve become possessed more than once.

It all started when I was five. I was out camping with my grandparents and along came Brian, the shaded six-year-old…

And then there was Roger, Norman, Tom, David, Michael, Butch, Tony, Cecil, Bob, Robert, Blackie, Bill, Dale, Anthony, and, and, and…

I think you’re beginning to get the picture. Thankfully, I ended up with one that I perceived as a bad-boy who ended up being one of the good guys. But before I found my bad-boy hero, I often asked myself the question: What magical lore did they possess which caused me to loose my mind and go a bit bonkers?

 Here are my conclusions.

 First off, one must recognize bad boys come in many variations. There are some seriously bad apples out there; ones you want no part of. You know the ones I’m talking about; those that have had serious run-ins with the law, can’t seem to stay out of jail, can't keep their hands off of other women or keep their noses out of the white powder. Try looking the other way and find a slightly milder variety of bad boy, one who has learned to channel their high testosterone in a positive light and aim it in your direction. It’s okay if they drive too fast, drink a little too much on occasion, or want to sweep you off to a motel every chance they get, because in the long run, they’ll treat you right and you’ll be in for a romantic ride of your life.

Researchers say there are reasons we fall for the bad boy, not that I personally agree with all of their findings, but I think they are worth mentioning.

 1. The strong appetite for adventure.  Okay, they got me here. Ever since I was old enough to look, the bad boy screamed, adventure and boy did I have some. Have you ever dreamed of being the center of attention of the famous rock star,  football player, MMA fighter? I know I have. Or were you the one who secretly had fantasies of being with the military hero or secret agent's mistress? Bad boys scream excitement, adventure and erotic fantasies.

 2. The impulse to “save” the wayward man.  Most real bad-boys (those that I mentioned above) are beyond saving. You either take them as they are, or leave them standing next to that Harley. Believe me when I tell you the really bad ones will change you more than you know. If you're not ready to follow them to jail or a gun fight at the Okay corral, leave these guys alone and find another. They don't want to be changed anymore than you do.

 3. Father-Daughter relationships. Are we looking for someone who reminds us of our rogue daddy? Do we fall for the older guy? Who really knows, I don’t.

I’d love to hear what makes you fall in love with a hopeless hero, that perpetual bad-boy who captures our heart and holds on to it like a pair of Harley handlebars.


Christina Mitchell said...

My first bad boy was Donnie Wahlberg from NKOTB. He had a rat-tail and ripped jeans. My grandma was scandalized!

I have always had mad love for the bad boys. I love tats and piercings and Dean frickin' Winchester.

I think every woman loves the idea of a bad guy who is "good" just for her. He may not conform to any society standards but he completely bows at her alter. Clayton Danvers on Bitten. Damon Salvatore on Vampire Diaries. The thought of an impulsive, strong, fierce man that becomes a kitten with us is the ultimate power fantasy. As the woman, you are in control of something that everyone said couldn't be controlled. In a world where women often feel at the mercy of violence and of governance, it's a meaningful fantasy to own the heart of someone powerful, dangerous and gorgeous.

Virginia Nelson said...

I couldn't have said it better Christina Mitchell!