Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Now's the perfect time to panic!

I have a confession. As a writer, as a woman, as a human being, I, Sandra Sookoo, am a first-class over-reactor.

Instead of letting something sink in, I immediately fly off the handle and get launched into the stratosphere, yammering reasons and excuses—and then I fall back to earth, embarrassed but ready to listen.

Such is life. This is me. I won’t—possibly can’t—change that. Sorry if you were secretly hoping otherwise LOL Please don’t be insulted if I’ve done it to you. It’s not intentional. It’s just being Sandi. Normal to frantic in six seconds. I’m afraid of camels, clowns and spiders. You might say damn she’s crazy, but at you said damn—and you won’t forget me. LOL

Why is this blog-worthy? Because I wear my heart on my sleeve, I feel things maybe more than I should, I think it gives me greater depth into my writing and it certainly brings attitude and humor to whatever stories I tell. And it’s become a darn good voice in my books.

The problem? I don’t think things through all the way like perhaps I should. I make snap decisions, judgments and begin writing projects without a flipping clue where the outcome should be.

Or do I?

Yes, I’m high strung, not high maintenance. There’s a difference. Some of my heroines are based on me. If you’ve ever wondered where I get some of my material, I go within. I laugh at myself and luckily, I’m not done doing stupid things so I’ll always have new material. LOL I may not be confident in other aspects of my life, but I believe in my writing. It can take a beating, I may threaten to call it quits, but at the end of the day, it’s strong and it’s true, and it’s mine.

The drawback to being me is when constructive criticism comes my way, I tend to jump into defensive mode like some sort of radioactive armadillo being poked with a stick. I’m trying to work on it, but I doubt it will change, either. Writing makes me happy and it’s stressful to have it out there for true industry professionals to look at.

But, I’m ecstatic to say, after the first hysterical reaction, I listen. I learn. I soak up the suggestions and lessons and advice because I want to do better. Be better. Write better.

This week has been slow for me writing-wise. I’ve put some newly learned lessons into action and I’ll be darned if the story didn’t flow better with a bit of a re-write. New snippets came my way yesterday and I’m anxious to use them, experiment with this new knowledge. Find out where I can go from here.

I’ve come a long way in the last two years of “getting serious” about my writing. I have a longer way to go until I’m a success, but luckily, people believe enough in me and my writing that I’ll get there.

The good news is that yes, I have an attitude, and yes, I may seem a highly emotional girl, but I’m still humble enough to know I don’t know everything and I can’t wait to see where else I can go.

See you at the top someday. Until then, keep writing. Thanks for reading the ramble.


Skhye said...

Hi, Sandra! All that attitude is great for publishing moment. Be glad you have it. :) Me, I tend to be a pessimist about my work. I find there are pros for that perspective too. Have a great day.

Skhye said...

Ugh. That's publishing MOMENTUM. Where is my brain-finger connection today???

Rebecca Royce said...

Of course I don't know anything about getting hysterical..having never done it myself. LMAO. I think we writers are by nature dramatic beings.

Mary Ricksen said...

Are we related. I'd swear we were!

Sandra Sookoo said...

Skhye--great for publishing momentum, eh? That's good to know! :-)

Funny Rebecca. Too bad I couldn't you my dramatic nature for the stage, huh? :-)

Mary--so you're another one, huh? :-) Small world. Thanks for stopping by :-)

nerinedorman said...

**pokes sticks at the radioactive armadillo**

Do you have ANY idea of the image you've got stuck in my head now?


Sandra Sookoo said...

Nerine--I know, right? You have to give me points for description! :-)

Unknown said...

I always like the hysterical reaction ...stomping through the house, throwing things, name calling....great stress also helps if you follow it up with a margarita. or two. i like to continue that for at least 48 hours before i slip into the "slight acceptance"'s usually done with mumbling and grumbling. Oh, and a margarita. or two. =)


J Hali Steele said...

Sandi, when I grow up - I want to be just like you. ROFLMAO.

I see the armadillo too, dammit!

Z(Aasiyah/Nolwynn) said...

Hey Sandi

Look at it this way. You're a writer, an artist, an artsie one, and thus, you have the right to be a little eccentric! Kudos for sticking to who you are though!

*wink* It's how I see myself actually, eccentric!



LM Spangler said...

I've been told to calm down and take a breath a time or two in my life so I'm right there with you Sandi!

This was a great post!


Rae Lori said...

Sounds like you need the island vacation also, Sandi. Come on down, there's room for more! lol
Don't forget your TBR pile. :-D